\t\t\t\tI don’t smell, and to be frank I am rather disappointed.<\/p>\n
Perhaps I should explain further….<\/p>\n
I am a girl (I hope that didn’t come as a surprise), and like most girls I am partial to the odd splash of perfume every once in a while and very much enjoy buying\/receiving little containers of unnaturally coloured liquid that promises to make me smell of a spring meadow, or clean linen, or a bowl of rose petals or something else that is equally fluffy sounding and heart warming. The problem I find however, is that having applied these substances to my person, it doesn’t take long until the scent of ‘fresh morning dew’ or ‘woodland glen whisper’ has worn off, and I go back to smelling of Fairy non-biological and quite often tea that I appear to spill with great frequency.<\/p>\n
So I put to you the question – what is the secret to smelling good for longer? I have tried almost every technique of using a little bit and a lot, spritzing behind the ears, the wrists, the collar bone, and have taken advice that perfume squirted about your knee pit is a sure place for giving off an alluring waft, but that doesn’t work. I have tried putting ‘smell’ on my clothes, in my hair, on my eyebrows – and once I even tried to make it last by applying it in layers over the period of an hour, but this dried in a sort of shiny film and made me appear as if I was laminated.<\/p>\n
I can’t quite put my finger on it…<\/p>\n
So really, if anyone has any advice I would greatly appreciate it, as I too dearly want to be one of those ladies that occasionally you pass by in the street who smell delicious, I want to just for once in my life smell as good as a branch of Interflora, I would love to actually feel like I am making a worthwhile investment in the duty free shop when buying scent, when really I’d be better off with a bottle of Grouse and a novelty biro…<\/p>\n
Maybe I just have excessively soaky uppy skin that likes to eat nice smell?<\/p>\n
Or maybe.. could it be possible? Indeed, perhaps (as my friend Helen has just suggested….)<\/p>\n
Am I pointing the nozzle the wrong way…?<\/p>\n
Now there’s a thought…\t\t<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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